Tales from the Nursing Home part 2…

 Good thing I started working out. Had to roll and hold a 400 pound dying woman while she pooped. I only gagged once, pretty proud of myself for that. The lady next door was yelling “help me, Steve Harvey!” Which did not help my situation at all. Apparently she just needed someone to wipe the crumbs off her shirt from the ice cream sandwich she just ate. She argued that it in fact was not ice cream but cake, even though she’d rather have ice cream. Still didn’t believe me when I told her it was ice cream. Must’ve been pretty good though, because she licked the leftovers off her dentures. Took me forever to finish med pass. Now I’m sitting at the nurses’ station, charting everything. There’s about ten of them in wheelchairs surrounding me. It looks like the strangest bummer cars you’ve ever seen. And it’s not even midnight. Hopefully this 16oz sugar free Red Bull. Will get me through the night.